By: FARAH SAAD
When we are going through a major life-altering change or shift in our lives, all the old fears surface. The uncertainty of the future makes us question everything we did in our lives up until that moment. You feel exhausted all the time.
These are all good signs because it means you are growing as a person and getting closer to reaching your goals. You feel very uncomfortable during this period because your thoughts are shifting to align with the new changes that are coming into your life. But you are having trouble letting go of the past, the natural instinct is to push back and fight the feelings that are coming up. This is called resistance to change. We all have some form of resistance. Change is hard.
What if you showed yourself patience and love during this period of change and uncertainty? You accepted the current circumstances and trusted everything will be ok even if it was hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I know sometimes it is not easy to accept our current circumstances. In these moments, you have to have faith in a life force bigger than you whatever that looks like to you. For me, that life force is God/Universe.
Nothing in life is permanent, we are evolving every second. While you read this, you are not thinking about what happened a second ago. You are just reading. Now you are reading this sentence. Similarly in life, every moment we are shifting. This creates positive or negative feelings in us depending on how much resistance we have to the shift. We have a hard time letting go of some feelings versus others. But if you observe yourself from a third person perspective, you will notice eventually every feeling rises and passes.
In the meantime, here are some tools to help you get through the change:
1) Become Aware of The Resistance in You
Tell yourself: “I am willing to let go of my resistance. I am willing to change.” Say it as much as you can. Trust and believe that there is a force bigger than you (God/universe) that is supporting you.
2) Be Conscious of Your Thoughts
When a negative thought comes up about the change. Tell yourself, this thought is not serving me. I am willing to let this thought go. These thoughts usually come from thinking about the uncertainty of the future. That is where the resistance to change also comes from. Uncertainty is always going to be a part of our lives. We do not know what is going to happen a second from now. All we have control over is the present moment.
Instead of worrying about the future, create positive thoughts around what you want in your future. Studies prove the more positive you think and visualize your future, the more likely you are to succeed at creating that reality in your life.
3) The Power of Gratitude
Practice gratitude: Be appreciative of the people in your life, events that went well, your basic needs being met (breathing, food, water, shelter, clothing, sleep, etc). Go through your day before going to sleep and be thankful for the experiences that went well and even for the experiences that didn’t go well. All experiences are an opportunity to learn and grow.
4) Surround Yourself Around Positive People
Seek the support of a select few positive people in your life that you trust and know love you. Speak to them about how you are feeling. Sometimes we just need to feel heard.
5) Love Yourself
Love yourself the way you are and ACCEPT where you are today. Life is a journey and every experience helps us become more resilient, aware and connected to ourselves. The whole purpose of life is to get comfortable in our own skin and unleash our full potential.
Hard moments in life or moments of change are to help us build our strength and resilience.
6) Self Care
Take time out to just relax whether it is reading a book, going for a massage, binge-watching Netflix. Do things that make you feel good. Prioritize your self-care during this time.
7) Do Your Best In Each Moment
Don’t be so hard on yourself if you are having trouble getting out of bed or not feeling your best self. There are going to be times where all you want to do is sleep. During this time, give yourself permission to sleep in. If you do need to get out of bed, do your best to get up, you might have to push yourself a little to get out of bed. This is where resilience is being built. The ability to push through the uncomfortableness of change.
So be patient and kind to yourself, this too shall pass.
If you want to learn more about how to ‘Be Kalm and Take Control’ during your shift, please email me at email@example.com to book a free 15 minutes consultation or check out our website www.bekalm.org.